I love my pets. I love each one of them. Sure, Marge pisses me off when she’s being a bitch, and Sonic gets a swift slap to the butt when he’s chewing the carpet, but I still give them the kisses. I let Serena rest her fat butt on my valuables even though she refuses to get along with the dogs, and I don’t think any less of Creole for trying to eat me . I love them all and I’ll give them the kisses forever! My love for my pets is unconditional. It’s easy to love them unconditionally, bec...
When I was younger, I blamed everything on Christians. The injustices in my life were caused by Christians and their intolerant and judgmental attitudes. After hearing some wonderful words by Kirk Franklin though, I could no longer hate Christians. That's when I became a vegan... Omnivores were the cause of all the world's problems. Their insensitivity to our fellow neighbors and their fat asses sickened me. I didn't like the half-ass vegetarians who wore leather or drank milk either. Non-veg...
As many of you know from my "gay" fantasy , I often dream of being a woman. It always seemed as though I'd have more fun as a member of the other gender. Recently though, I realized something shocking: I am a woman! Unfortunately, it's not as glamorous as I imagined... Like a woman, I'm moody and obsessive. I have mood swings so violent that they can only be described as PMS. It'd show like a zit on my writing if I wrote more often, but I don't because my obsessive-compulsive behavior has me...
As an avid reader of JoeUser.com , the most controversial site on the Internet , you are aware of the war between the rich and the poor . The poor demand that the rich aid them with aid to aid them in life , while the rich demand that anybody who's poor should quit begging and get a job . After some very insightful articles by Bakerstreet , I have to side with the rich in spite of the sheer incompetence of the poor. However, I cannot deny that I too am an incompetent buffoon and woul...
As the liberals seek to bring equality to the world by pulling everybody down to the lowest common denominator of living, one must wonder how much harm they are doing to society. They have already convinced many individuals that proper English is evil , compelling many of our youth to use a form of English far inferior to Spanglish . Some of you might be proud of that, claiming that proper behavior is an evil practice of the bourgeois, but is formality, etiquette, and properness really that ba...